SPEND THE LOOT!

WANTED!! Citizens who will help us spend $720,000. We need your help in coming up with ideas to spend $720,000 in community development block grant funds!

It wasn't too long ago that taxes were collected for definite purposes. Maybe you and I wouldn't agree with those intended purposes, but at least you knew what to argue about. Now, the money is collected and then the bureaucrats look for ways to spend it. It's a whole new ball game in Santa Rosa.

How could these people ask for help spending tax money when some are still complaining about Proposition 13, the California property tax reduction measure? Prop. 13 was supposed to be the death knell for government services in California. Since 1978, when the measure passed by a two to one margin, whenever there is a cutback in fire and police services Prop. 13 is blamed.

The ad was cleverly designed. First there is a cartoon picture of a crowd of people, obviously happy because they are going to receive "block grant" money. And, the ethnic balance was oh, so perfect. See the "Mexican American" with his hard hat? How about the "Black man," and the "Woman?" They are all smiling broadly. And if you look close you can even see a cowboy hat (Rednecks included), and what looks like the matronly hair bun of a "Senior Citizen."

This is all very good democratic America, allocating tax money for ethnic minorities and the poor. But what about the happy little man with a suit, tie, prestigious hat and pipe? Why is he smiling? I think I know why.

The well dressed man is either a construction contractor who is salivating at the thought of new contracts with the city, or more likely, he is a local politician standing up front, basking in the glory. After all, he is responsible for bringing all this money to the poor, the minorities and the deserving.

"Eliminate slums and blight or meet an urgent community need." So says the ad ... then read on to see how "we" (whoever that is) have spent the money in past years' funding: "Curb, gutter and sidewalk repairs, built a multi-use building, reconstructed streets, rehabilitated homes in community development neighborhoods, repaired water lines" and so on. Isn't this exciting?

If these projects don't interest you, consider that under federal law some public service programs are eligible. How about "child care, alcoholism, drug abuse, acquisition of land for housing?" Ok, so all this sounds dull. Then submit your own ideas. The ad says that "your ideas are important!!!!" (Yes, four exclamation marks after 'important') so it must be important.

The reason it is so important is because these poverty pimps really need "citizen input" so they can appear to look as if they are actually doing some community service. If no one showed up to tender their opinion, the embarrassment would be unbearable.

However, I have an idea. I will submit a proposal on what to do with the money. Here's the COMMENTARY proposal for disposition of community block grant funds.

1. Eliminate slums and blight: Stop taxing and regulating people to death. Then, I'm sure poor people could better afford good housing and there would be less slums and blight. See how easy?

2. Repair curbs, gutters and sidewalks: I thought that property taxes were, in part, for Public Works to use to keep the streets and sidewalks in good condition. Better yet, allow home owner's associations to assess themselves for these services. It would be so much cheaper this way. You know how government wastes money!

3. Rehabilitate homes in community development neighborhoods: Get out of the "community development" scam so that entrepreneurial contractors can built homes cheaper and better for those who need them. To facilitate this, end building codes and abolish all zoning laws. See, nothing to it!

4. Other eligible programs under federal law: Leave child care to those responsible for the children, the parents. All the state ever does with children is indoctrinate them to be good good citizens who pay taxes, or if not that, then tax consumers who support "community redevelopment" programs such as this.

Drug abuse: How dare you waste tax payers hard-earned money worrying about "abused drugs!"

Acquisition of land for housing: Get out of the property theft business altogether. Everyone knows how this works. Blocks of homes in poorer areas are taken by force from their owners, the whole area is razed, and in place of the old homes, fancy civic and cultural centers are built. Then the poor home owners who were displaced must ask you thieves for assistance with their housing needs. This way, they will become dependent upon you. Very clever!

5. After the above has been accomplished, disband your agency, and return the money to Washington with an enclosed note demanding that it be given back to whomever it was taken from. Clean out your desks and leave after turning out the lights, and sell the building you've been using and donate the proceeds to charity. Then, if you are up to it, get honest jobs serving others un-coercively in the marketplace.